When You Know You've Found the One

Today is our wedding anniversary and I am proud to say that in the four years my husband and I have been together, we managed to never tire of each other. Each day is just as exciting as it was during our courtship. My husband still opens doors for me, he still pulls out my chair. Everyday before leaving work, he calls to make sure me and the kids are okay. He's the type of father that will get up at 5:00 o'clock in the morning and make a run to the supermarket to pick up a box of pampers. He's spontaneous, he's nurturing (I can't say that about all men), and he doesn't leave the house without giving us a kiss. I love that he's a good listener, a provider and what's more important, he's a mighty man of God. Before I met him, I had given up on marriage. After my divorce from husband number one, I told myself I was going to live my life being happily single. Little did I know, God had better plans for me. I met my husband on his job and little did we know we attended the same church. We would casually chat in passing until one day he decided to give me his number. I finally called him two days later and since that day we've never gone a day without talking to each other. Some people are blessed to go through life with a God-given helpmate. I consider myself to be blessed to have a mate who I enjoy coming home to, he's not perfect but we are perfect for each other. When do you know you've found the one? When the two of you compromise without hesitation and when you constantly think of that person the same way you did when you initially met. I knew my husband was the one...during both pregnancies I'd awake in the middle of the night and hear him whispering a prayer to God that his children are born healthy and happy. He is the one, the only one tailor-made for me.

Came across this on FB...Check it out

You can't enter any other country illegally why is it racism when you do it here!
Let me see if I have this correct...
-IF YOU CROSS THE MEXICAN BORDER YOU PAY A FINE AND ARE DEPORTED, THE SECOND TIME YOU ARE JAILED FOR UP TO 10 YEARS.
-IF YOU CROSS THE FRENCH BORDER YOU ARE FINED,JAILED AND THEN DEPORTED.
-IF YOU ENTER ENGLAND ILLEGALLY YOU ARE FINED 10,000 AND DEPORTED
IF YOU ENTER ITALY ILLEGALLY YOU ARE FINED 13000 EURO AND DEPORTED
- IF YOU CROSS THE NORTH KOREAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET 12 YEARS HARD LABOR.
- IF YOU CROSS THE IRANIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU ARE DETAINED INDEFINITELY.
- IF YOU CROSS THE AFGHAN BORDER ILLEGALLY, YOU GET SHOT.
- IF YOU CROSS THE NORTH KOREAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET 12 YEARS HARD LABOR.
- IF YOU CROSS THE IRANIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU ARE DETAINED INDEFINITELY.
- IF YOU CROSS THE AFGHAN BORDER ILLEGALLY, YOU GET SHOT.
- IF YOU CROSS THE SAUDI ARABIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE JAILED.
- IF YOU CROSS THE CHINESE BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU MAY NEVER BE HEARD FROM AGAIN.
- IF YOU CROSS THE VENEZUELAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE BRANDED A SPY AND YOUR FATE WILL BE SEALED.
- IF YOU CROSS THE CUBAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE THROWN INTO POLITICAL PRISON TO ROT.


- IF YOU CROSS THE U.S. BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET................................
1 - A JOB,
2 - A DRIVERS LICENSE,
3 - SOCIAL SECURITY CARD,
4 - WELFARE,
5 - FOOD STAMPS,
6 - CREDIT CARDS,
7 - SUBSIDIZED RENT OR A LOAN TO BUY A HOUSE,
8 - FREE EDUCATION,
9 - FREE HEALTH CARE,
10 - A LOBBYIST IN WASHINGTON,
11 - BILLIONS OF DOLLARS WORTH OF PUBLIC DOCUMENTS PRINTED IN YOUR LANGUAGE,
12 - AND THE RIGHT TO CARRY YOUR COUNTRY'S FLAG WHILE YOU PROTEST THAT YOU DON'T GET ENOUGH RESPECT.

Pick up these hot titles if you haven't already

Out of the mouth of a four year-old

Nowadays little black girls are bombarded with images that the media holds in high regards; the European standard of beauty. Television, and magazines alike showcase images of blonde, blue-eyed, artificial breasts, and rail thin bodies. The message often conveyed is, "you're not beautiful unless you look like this." Rarely do they see images of themselves in their natural state. Oftentimes they see a black girl with weaved extensions down her back. When asked, who's the prettiest black female on the celebrity scene? Beyonce, and Halle Berry are always at the top of the list. Black beauty comes in all shades from dark chocolate to damn-near white. Unfortunately it's the lighter side of the spectrum that gets props and adoration.

I recently witnessed my four year-old cousin push and taunt another cousin, who happened to be five. The four year-old told the five year-old that she was "black" and "ugly," and for those reasons she didn't like her. Mind you this four year-old told me that she only played with white dolls because they were prettier. This upset me terribly and what's more disturbing, when I told the mother about it she merely shrugged it off.

Imagine a beautiful four year-old girl already ingrained with the notion that black is ugly and inferior. This disturbed me so that I am making it my mission to teach our little black girls self-esteem. Don't mean to sound racist but when I hear a little girl in a sense saying that everything she is has no value then I have to interact. I don't want her to grow up with an inferiority complex and then pass that on to her children and children's children.

I believe self-esteem starts by embracing everything beautiful about yourself; your culture, your history. To be honest, I don't see anything positive in the media, therefore it has to begin at home and if it's not starting at home, it has to be taught in school or church. I'm on a mission to teach my children to not be influenced by the images they see on television or in magazines. Their culture is a rich culture, my daughter will know that black dolls are just as beautiful as any dolls, her skin is not inferior and she should never be ashamed of who she is.

Valleys Of Neptune

Awaiting a New Arrival

A lot of people may not relate, but those of you can will empathize with me. It's 3:00 a.m. in the morning and I'm up bright-eyed and bushy tailed. I fell asleep around 11:00 but for the past four hours I've been getting up to pee. Now I know you're asking yourself, "Where is she going with this?" The title should've given it away, I'm 33 weeks pregnant with my second child and boy oh boy is he sitting like pretty boy Floyd on momma's bladder.

Not to mention, he's a night owl who likes to boogey woogey with his kicks, twists, and turns. Sometimes I'll get up and read to him to try and soothe him. Other times, I don't bother...a boy's gotta do what a boy's gotta do. A week ago my OB informed me that my cervix is short. It's only one centimeter...It was 3 centimeters around the same time with my daughter...so she put me on bed rest for the next three weeks. Right now, I'm trying to take it easy and for the sake of my unborn son, get as much bed rest as possible which is kind of hard when I'm getting up every five minutes to pee.

My son's due date is scheduled for May 1, but at the rate he's going my husband and I along with his big sister may be kissing his cheeks sometime around Resurrection Sunday (Easter for those of you who believe in the Easter Bunny). Anyway, in the meantime, I'm going to sit and relax, pray and meditate as I await my new arrival.

Here's to You, Jacklyn

She was the epitome of class. Educated, self-reliant, outspoken, a true gem in every sense of the word. In the three years I spent as her assistant I learned the importance of being discreet, business etiquette, direct deposit as opposed to standing in line at the bank, sisterhood, and self esteem. She was successful but always grounded. She could have boasted how she was a key board member of several businesses in town. She owned real estate. She was president of the graduate chapter of her sorority and served as the sorority's undergraduate adviser. She drove a cute sporty red convertible Nissan 240. Her clothing wasn't designer but it was conservative, stylish, never flashy. She always wore her shoulder length hair in a french role, always neat and not a single hair out of place. The thing I remember most about her was her laugh, sort of a goofy kind of laugh, nothing loud or obnoxious, but a really cute goofy laugh and she was laughing all the time.
Her door was always open, so students and faculty alike gravitated to her office. The three years I spent in her office flew by along with my college years. I graduated and moved out of town but on occasion I would call or come by to see her and catch her up on the latest gossip. As time went on we lost touch and communicated with an occasional email. Although she kept her personal life very personal, I witnessed her involvement in a couple of dead end relationships. It wasn't until after I graduated and left town that she eventually fell in love and married the man of her dreams. They were a beautiful, successful couple. Then one day I got a phone call from my mom.
"Guess what?" I dread when she starts off the conversation with that.
"What?" I answered, "Jackie's husband died today."
"Wow." Was all I could say. I was so hurt for her that I couldn't pick up the phone to give her a call. I replayed over a million times what I would say to her but I just couldn't pick up the phone. Fast forward one year to the day.
"Are you sitting down?" It's mom again and I know she's about to break some more bad news.
"Jackie had a heart attack....She's dead."
"Dead? Jackie Merchant?"
My heart sank as I thought of Jackie, lifeless, it just didn't seem right. She was healthy, how could she have a heart attack? I always pictured Jackie growing old in age, I never imagined her dying so young, she was only 44.
It's been nearly 6 years since her death. I still think about her and sometimes I find it hard to drive by the University and not be able to drop in and talk to her. I miss hearing her laugh and I hate that she's not around to see the positive influence she's had on my life.

The Importance Of...

You would think as a writer I should be pouring out daily inspirations or confessions of the latest goings-on in my life. While maintaining a career, a healthy marriage and mothering an active 20 month-old, writing, for the most part, gets put on the back burner. Some people can manage to do all, equally well, and I applaud them. I'm just not one of them. Right now I'm sacrificing the writing to concentrate on what's really important, my family. I lavish my husband and daughter with my full attention. As a mother and wife I make it a daily habit of making my home a pleasant one. You won't find beds unmade, clothes stacked to the ceiling, and rings around the toilets. I make it my business to have dinner cooked and everything in order.

Now, I don't leave myself out of the equation. My idea of relaxation is a getaway to the spa or a trip somewhere with the hubby or other family members. Somedays I just like to curl up on the sofa with soft music in the background and get into a really good book.

Maybe one day, I'll get the inspiration to churn something out worth reading. Since the publications of my last novels, "Mile High Confessions, " and "Happily Never After," I feel my writing has since moved in another direction. A lot of it has to do with my changing interests. Some of it may be contributed to my level of maturity. What I thought seemed relevant once, has no significance in my life now. My level of spirituality has grown tremendously. There's more to life than the superficial characters I have often written about in my books. I guess it's okay, if you tend to like that but I feel like taking my characters and my readers in a new direction now. Stay tuned.