Tuesday, December 14, 2010

2011 Is My Year to Flourish

I've gotta do some house cleaning, and what I mean by that is that I have to rid my thoughts of negativity and rid my space of negative people.  I'm adopting a mentality of win, and I'm tapping into my soul and I'm bringing out the woman whom God has meant for me to be.  Like Mary Mary declare in song, "It's the God in me."  The God in me has no concept of fear because fear and faith cannot coexist in the same plane.  I've spent most of my adult life operating in fear mode and it's lead me down a road of depression, regrets, and life unfulfilling.   From now on I'm choosing to be lead by faith and that supernatural ability called the holy spirit.

The upcoming year has a lot in store for me and my family and each day I take the time to pray and meditate on God's promises.  Jeremiah 29:11 reads: "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  That promise alone is enough to make me dance and shout.  The upcoming year will be my year to finally live the life that I have been born to live. I will direct more energy on things that matter: kingdom building, my family, and generating wealth.

As I stated in the beginning, there is no room for negativity, cynicism, or mediocracy in my life.  My circle of friends or "people I know," is getting narrower by the day.  I'm not complaining because a good house cleaning is exactly what I need.  I'm gonna keep it real. Gone are people who do nothing but take up space in my phone. Gone are those who lie when it's convenient to them.  Gone are the people who lack ambition.  My delete button will be broken when its all said and done.  It's all Good, because God has planted within me a new seed and when His Season comes, (I say His because God does everything on His time) I will flourish. Glory be to God!

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

My Love letter to Layla and Miles

Since the day you two came into my life, my days have been filled with nothing but love.  I am overjoyed and my heart sings when I wake up in the morning and see the two of you sleeping, peacefully.  Your cherub little faces are all nestled on top of your pillows and if I could freeze that moment in time, I would.  I would forever hold your innocence and sweet cheeks in the palm of my hands.  Nothing gives me more satisfaction in knowing you two are happy, healthy, safe, and content.

Your father deserves a father of the year award for taking care of you with the same nurturing, love, and attentiveness that a mother normally gives.  You're never without hugs, kisses, and a little discipline here and there.  You two are my mighty little warriors for God.  As your mother, I promise to teach you the gems to living a long prosperous life.  Gem #1: Always know that although you have earthly parents who would lay down their lives for you, you have a friend in Jesus who loves you and who's paid the ultimate sacrifice. Gem #2: Respect yourselves, always know your self worth. Gem #3: When you respect yourselves, you automatically respect others if they are deserving. Gem #4: Exercise and maintain a healthy diet. You are what you eat, if your diet is horrible, then your health is compromised, and when your health is compromised, you're not in a good state of well being.  Gem#5: Be a blessing to someone you don't know either through your time or through your giving. Lastly Gem#6: Have a burning desire to go through life only getting the best out of it.

I understand you will have trying times, but be equipped to handle them.  And if you need someone to talk to, mommy and daddy will be there to listen for as long as you two need us.  And even if Mommy and Daddy are no longer around just know the love of God is greater than the both of us.

So Layla, my sweet little angel, your strong will has the ability to put mom through a rigorous test at times, but I am so blessed that God allowed you and Miles to use my body to bring forth your precious little lives into this world.

Miles, my merciful warrior, my mighty-man-of-God you and your sister have made life for me more meaningful.  When I get rejection after rejection, when my calls get ignored, my emails don't get returned, when I'm sharing and doors get slammed in my face.  I think of you two asleep, peacefully in the bed and I wipe my tears, say a prayer of victory and get myself going.  I'll take a beating so you guys won't have to.  I'll get laughed at and talked about so you guys won't have to.  Layla and Miles, I want to do whatever it takes to make you proud of me.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Team K.I.M.

Since I started Galliencafe, I realize the majority of my success will come from people I don't know.  When I first started the business back in September I called my list of friends, 56 to be exact, and asked their support for my business by buying my products.  Only five of them made good on their promise.  I thank God I now have the power to K.I.M. keep it moving.  When I hear excuses and they come as natural as breathing, I just say, "no problem, thank you very much" and keep it moving.  I am in a position to collect "no's" and that's just fine. It's a beautiful thing to get the door slammed in your face when you try to give out free samples.  I love to call cell phones and listen to them ring for minutes at a time then hang up only to have that person call back.  When they realize it's me, they either hang up or find a reason to get off the phone.  I don't take it personally, I just keep it moving.  My business team has adopted that same method, to keep it moving...whether it be product, rejected phone calls, excuses, or people.  An ancient Chinese proverb says, "Be not afraid of going slowly, but be afraid only of standing still."  When we stand still the momentum drops, but when we keep it moving, everybody wins.

I've (third from left) only been in the business since September 2010 and this is my team.  Not present are two team members from the Houston area, three from Huntsville, Texas, one member in Kansas and one member in New York.

Write the Vision, Make it plain

About four years ago, I was sitting on the floor of my small one bedroom apartment taking account of things that happened in my life.  Some things were good, and some had me going, "what the hell was I thinking?"  I had seen myself go from being married at the age of 26 to being divorced at 31.  I was an author of two novels which only put my name out there but I wasn't on the New York Times Bestseller's list, truth be told I couldn't even crack the top 1000 seller's list on Amazon.  I was single, I was miserable, I was disgusted with the person I had become.  I was the one who always inspired others but I wasn't motivated enough to inspire myself.  I sank into a small depression and for a year, I had very limited communication with people outside of work.

One day I had a talk with the woman in the mirror. The only person holding me back was me.  I had been blessed with a tremendous talent, I was fortunate to be employed with a company that gave me access, why was I not fulfilled?  So I sat down and wrote my feelings and I remember my mom sharing a very important biblical verse to me.

Habakkuk 2:2-3 says, And the Lord answered me and said, Write the vision, and make it plain upon tables that he may run that readeth it.  For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak, and not lie:  though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry.  So four years ago, I wrote down the following:

1.     Have a writing career that will inspire the lives of others that will in turn have a substantial financial
        impact on me, my family, and my church.

2.     Have a blessed marriage with a man whom God chooses for me.

3.     Be blessed with a mentally and physically happy child or children.

4.    Have a wonderful and affordable home filled with God's loving presence, peace, and open space.

5.    Be a guest on the Oprah Winfrey Show talking about a movie based on my book.

6.    Traveling the world with my husband and child(ren) without worrying about cost.

7.    Becoming a guest lecturer of creative writing at University level.

8.    Being an active member in my church.

9.    Becoming more extroverted and less worried about what others think of me.

10.  Living a life that God wants me to live that will be a blessing to my child(ren) and their off-spring.

11.  Only flying one to two trips or just enough hours to keep my insurance and flight benefits.

12.  Starting a ministry for those who have a creative vision but just can't seem to get started on the right
       path.

Since then only 3 of the following have been fulfilled.  The others will come at their appointed time.  In September, 2010 I launched my own healthy beverage business.  I know in order for it to be successful I must command God's words to speak on my behalf.  My vision is that my company, "galliencafe" thrives and become a multi-million dollar company.  This will come become I have the faith and God's word says, "wait, because it will surely come, it will not tarry."

This is my season and I believe God presents you with one opportunity in order for you to achieve what His purpose is for you.  All you have to do is write it down.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Taking the "Me" Out of the Equation


Now I realized why and how I failed at things in the past.  I failed at my first marriage because I wanted all of "my" needs met and didn't care about the needs of my spouse.  I failed to make a substantial living off my writing career because "I" was too scared to approach people and share my God-given talents with them.  I failed to take off in a cosmetics company because I was too busy worrying about rejection and I didn't take the time to learn the fundamentals of the business.  All my failures happened as a result of "me" worrying about "me."  I was more worried about my "ego" than I did having money in the bank.  Sometimes the enemy is within-a-me.  

Until you take yourself out of the equation you will forever find yourself "stopping at the start," and opportunities will pass you by quicker than you can blink.  Since I have embarked on my new business venture, everyday is an opportunity for me to focus on the needs of others.  When I look at my husband and my two kids I am reminded why I need to get out of my comfort zone and work the business.   Time is a precious thing and once it's past there's no way of turning it back. 

So in September 2010 I became CEO of my own healthy beverage company, laugh if you must, scratch your head if you will...My company allows me to tune into the needs of others on a daily basis.  I've discovered the formula for success and it's way beyond me. It's picking up the phone and reconnecting with a friend I haven't talked to in a long time.  It's meeting a stranger and asking them something as simple as, "how are you?" because it may be the only time someone genuinely asks of their well being.  I've talked to people who are dealing with lupus, I've talked to a person who suffered a heart attack, I've shared the healthy benefits of my product with them and they have been very receptive.

And so from this day forward, I will make it a habit to share my business with the world.  I can no longer be a secret agent, I can longer worry about how I am going to be perceived because I know people will talk whether I'm doing good or bad.  When I'm writing and sharing my stories with the world, I can't keep telling myself that I'm not good enough when I know God has given me this talent. So what if I'm scatter brained and I tend to lose my train of thought or sometime I stutter when I get overly excited I don't care anymore.  Those are small things I can correct.  Life is so much bigger than me. I know this now!

Friday, September 3, 2010

Flowers for Miss Bobbie

My mom has always been the spiritual/religious force in my life.  Every Sunday morning my sister and I would wake up to the sounds of Brother Leroy Bryant's Gospel Show.  Mom would cook a hearty breakfast before sending us off to Sunday school.  Sometimes my sister and I were the only two present but mom made sure we were always there.  Our relationship with God is stronger because mom made sure we had that foundation.  She taught us that in life's journeys the roads aren't always easy but if you take God on the journey with you, He will bring you through it, a better person.  Case in point when my parents separated and later divorced.  The betrayal mom experience was very hurtful.  Instead of finding ways of getting even, she took our hands and we knelt down in prayer.  She used to tell us, "God isn't sleep, you reap what you sow, what may have you laughing now will have you crying later."  Years later as adults we see and understand just what she meant.

I have seen times when mom did so much with so little and I know it had to have been with God's help that her bills were never late.  Single-handily, she was able to pay mortgage, cheerleading camp, band camp, dental visits, new car tires and batteries, prom dresses, class rings, and still have a nice Sunday meal waiting when we got out of church.  For this my mom deserves her roses, her lillies, her orchids, and birds of paradise.  I listen to Marvin's sap song, "Never would have made it," with a new sense of gratitude.  Thank God mom taught me a foundation that through God all things are possible.  Now I'm able to pass it on to my children.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Michael Jackson and His Music

June 25th marks the one year anniversary of the untimely death of Michael Jackson.  I remember what I was doing the moment I heard the news.  I was sitting in bed watching BET's 106 & Park when it was interrupted with breaking news.  The last thing I expected to hear was that the King of Pop was dead.  I cried like a baby, my then 13 month old daughter was staring at me wandering what the hell was going on.  The world was robbed of a remarkably talented soul, a one-of-a-kind spirit.

My love affair with Michael Jackson dealt mainly with his music.  My favorite album would have to be the "Off the Wall," album.  Whenever I hear, "Don't Stop Til You Get Enough," I think of the summer of 1980. I remember playing, "red light, green light," in the middle of the street, going as far as I can on the merry-go-round, eating fresh cut watermelon and sitting on the porch combing my dolls' hair.  As a five year old, the world is my oyster and Michael Jackson's voice is pure magic.

When "Thriller," hit the scene in 1983, my third grade reading teacher played the tape everyday in class for us.  When Michael Jackson moonwalked on the Motown 25 special, he catapulted to another level.  I couldn't get enough of his music I even wrote a letter to his fan club asking if he could come to my hometown (pop. 25,000) to perform at the local skating rink (how cute).

Michael had an extensive music library, but if I had to pick five of my favorites they would be:

1.  Can't Help It (Off the Wall album)
2.  Don't Stop Til You Get Enough (Off the Wall)
3.  Human Nature (Thriller)
4.  Liberian Girl (Bad)
5.  I Just Can't Stop Loving You (Duet with Siedah Garrett on Bad album)

Rest in peace, Michael.  I can't get enough of your music.  I Wish I had the opportunity to see you perform.  Maybe in the next life.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

When You Know You've Found the One

Today is our wedding anniversary and I am proud to say that in the four years my husband and I have been together, we managed to never tire of each other. Each day is just as exciting as it was during our courtship. My husband still opens doors for me, he still pulls out my chair. Everyday before leaving work, he calls to make sure me and the kids are okay. He's the type of father that will get up at 5:00 o'clock in the morning and make a run to the supermarket to pick up a box of pampers. He's spontaneous, he's nurturing (I can't say that about all men), and he doesn't leave the house without giving us a kiss. I love that he's a good listener, a provider and what's more important, he's a mighty man of God. Before I met him, I had given up on marriage. After my divorce from husband number one, I told myself I was going to live my life being happily single. Little did I know, God had better plans for me. I met my husband on his job and little did we know we attended the same church. We would casually chat in passing until one day he decided to give me his number. I finally called him two days later and since that day we've never gone a day without talking to each other. Some people are blessed to go through life with a God-given helpmate. I consider myself to be blessed to have a mate who I enjoy coming home to, he's not perfect but we are perfect for each other. When do you know you've found the one? When the two of you compromise without hesitation and when you constantly think of that person the same way you did when you initially met. I knew my husband was the one...during both pregnancies I'd awake in the middle of the night and hear him whispering a prayer to God that his children are born healthy and happy. He is the one, the only one tailor-made for me.

Friday, May 7, 2010

Came across this on FB...Check it out

You can't enter any other country illegally why is it racism when you do it here!
Let me see if I have this correct...
-IF YOU CROSS THE MEXICAN BORDER YOU PAY A FINE AND ARE DEPORTED, THE SECOND TIME YOU ARE JAILED FOR UP TO 10 YEARS.
-IF YOU CROSS THE FRENCH BORDER YOU ARE FINED,JAILED AND THEN DEPORTED.
-IF YOU ENTER ENGLAND ILLEGALLY YOU ARE FINED 10,000 AND DEPORTED
IF YOU ENTER ITALY ILLEGALLY YOU ARE FINED 13000 EURO AND DEPORTED
- IF YOU CROSS THE NORTH KOREAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET 12 YEARS HARD LABOR.
- IF YOU CROSS THE IRANIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU ARE DETAINED INDEFINITELY.
- IF YOU CROSS THE AFGHAN BORDER ILLEGALLY, YOU GET SHOT.
- IF YOU CROSS THE NORTH KOREAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET 12 YEARS HARD LABOR.
- IF YOU CROSS THE IRANIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU ARE DETAINED INDEFINITELY.
- IF YOU CROSS THE AFGHAN BORDER ILLEGALLY, YOU GET SHOT.
- IF YOU CROSS THE SAUDI ARABIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE JAILED.
- IF YOU CROSS THE CHINESE BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU MAY NEVER BE HEARD FROM AGAIN.
- IF YOU CROSS THE VENEZUELAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE BRANDED A SPY AND YOUR FATE WILL BE SEALED.
- IF YOU CROSS THE CUBAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE THROWN INTO POLITICAL PRISON TO ROT.


- IF YOU CROSS THE U.S. BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET................................
1 - A JOB,
2 - A DRIVERS LICENSE,
3 - SOCIAL SECURITY CARD,
4 - WELFARE,
5 - FOOD STAMPS,
6 - CREDIT CARDS,
7 - SUBSIDIZED RENT OR A LOAN TO BUY A HOUSE,
8 - FREE EDUCATION,
9 - FREE HEALTH CARE,
10 - A LOBBYIST IN WASHINGTON,
11 - BILLIONS OF DOLLARS WORTH OF PUBLIC DOCUMENTS PRINTED IN YOUR LANGUAGE,
12 - AND THE RIGHT TO CARRY YOUR COUNTRY'S FLAG WHILE YOU PROTEST THAT YOU DON'T GET ENOUGH RESPECT.

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Out of the mouth of a four year-old

Nowadays little black girls are bombarded with images that the media holds in high regards; the European standard of beauty. Television, and magazines alike showcase images of blonde, blue-eyed, artificial breasts, and rail thin bodies. The message often conveyed is, "you're not beautiful unless you look like this." Rarely do they see images of themselves in their natural state. Oftentimes they see a black girl with weaved extensions down her back. When asked, who's the prettiest black female on the celebrity scene? Beyonce, and Halle Berry are always at the top of the list. Black beauty comes in all shades from dark chocolate to damn-near white. Unfortunately it's the lighter side of the spectrum that gets props and adoration.

I recently witnessed my four year-old cousin push and taunt another cousin, who happened to be five. The four year-old told the five year-old that she was "black" and "ugly," and for those reasons she didn't like her. Mind you this four year-old told me that she only played with white dolls because they were prettier. This upset me terribly and what's more disturbing, when I told the mother about it she merely shrugged it off.

Imagine a beautiful four year-old girl already ingrained with the notion that black is ugly and inferior. This disturbed me so that I am making it my mission to teach our little black girls self-esteem. Don't mean to sound racist but when I hear a little girl in a sense saying that everything she is has no value then I have to interact. I don't want her to grow up with an inferiority complex and then pass that on to her children and children's children.

I believe self-esteem starts by embracing everything beautiful about yourself; your culture, your history. To be honest, I don't see anything positive in the media, therefore it has to begin at home and if it's not starting at home, it has to be taught in school or church. I'm on a mission to teach my children to not be influenced by the images they see on television or in magazines. Their culture is a rich culture, my daughter will know that black dolls are just as beautiful as any dolls, her skin is not inferior and she should never be ashamed of who she is.

Valleys Of NeptuneValleys Of Neptune

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Awaiting a New Arrival

A lot of people may not relate, but those of you can will empathize with me. It's 3:00 a.m. in the morning and I'm up bright-eyed and bushy tailed. I fell asleep around 11:00 but for the past four hours I've been getting up to pee. Now I know you're asking yourself, "Where is she going with this?" The title should've given it away, I'm 33 weeks pregnant with my second child and boy oh boy is he sitting like pretty boy Floyd on momma's bladder.
Not to mention, he's a night owl who likes to boogey woogey with his kicks, twists, and turns. Sometimes I'll get up and read to him to try and soothe him. Other times, I don't bother...a boy's gotta do what a boy's gotta do. A week ago my OB informed me that my cervix is short. It's only one centimeter...It was 3 centimeters around the same time with my daughter...so she put me on bed rest for the next three weeks. Right now, I'm trying to take it easy and for the sake of my unborn son, get as much bed rest as possible which is kind of hard when I'm getting up every five minutes to pee.
My son's due date is scheduled for May 1, but at the rate he's going my husband and I along with his big sister may be kissing his cheeks sometime around Resurrection Sunday (Easter for those of you who believe in the Easter Bunny). Anyway, in the meantime, I'm going to sit and relax, pray and meditate as I await my new arrival.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Here's to You, Jacklyn

She was the epitome of class. Educated, self-reliant, outspoken, a true gem in every sense of the word. In the three years I spent as her assistant I learned the importance of being discreet, business etiquette, direct deposit as opposed to standing in line at the bank, sisterhood, and self esteem. She was successful but always grounded. She could have boasted how she was a key board member of several businesses in town. She owned real estate. She was president of the graduate chapter of her sorority and served as the sorority's undergraduate adviser. She drove a cute sporty red convertible Nissan 240. Her clothing wasn't designer but it was conservative, stylish, never flashy. She always wore her shoulder length hair in a french role, always neat and not a single hair out of place. The thing I remember most about her was her laugh, sort of a goofy kind of laugh, nothing loud or obnoxious, but a really cute goofy laugh and she was laughing all the time.
Her door was always open, so students and faculty alike gravitated to her office. The three years I spent in her office flew by along with my college years. I graduated and moved out of town but on occasion I would call or come by to see her and catch her up on the latest gossip. As time went on we lost touch and communicated with an occasional email. Although she kept her personal life very personal, I witnessed her involvement in a couple of dead end relationships. It wasn't until after I graduated and left town that she eventually fell in love and married the man of her dreams. They were a beautiful, successful couple. Then one day I got a phone call from my mom.
"Guess what?" I dread when she starts off the conversation with that.
"What?" I answered, "Jackie's husband died today."
"Wow." Was all I could say. I was so hurt for her that I couldn't pick up the phone to give her a call. I replayed over a million times what I would say to her but I just couldn't pick up the phone. Fast forward one year to the day.
"Are you sitting down?" It's mom again and I know she's about to break some more bad news.
"Jackie had a heart attack....She's dead."
"Dead? Jackie Merchant?"
My heart sank as I thought of Jackie, lifeless, it just didn't seem right. She was healthy, how could she have a heart attack? I always pictured Jackie growing old in age, I never imagined her dying so young, she was only 44.
It's been nearly 6 years since her death. I still think about her and sometimes I find it hard to drive by the University and not be able to drop in and talk to her. I miss hearing her laugh and I hate that she's not around to see the positive influence she's had on my life.






Friday, January 29, 2010

The Importance Of...

You would think as a writer I should be pouring out daily inspirations or confessions of the latest goings-on in my life. While maintaining a career, a healthy marriage and mothering an active 20 month-old, writing, for the most part, gets put on the back burner. Some people can manage to do all, equally well, and I applaud them. I'm just not one of them. Right now I'm sacrificing the writing to concentrate on what's really important, my family. I lavish my husband and daughter with my full attention. As a mother and wife I make it a daily habit of making my home a pleasant one. You won't find beds unmade, clothes stacked to the ceiling, and rings around the toilets. I make it my business to have dinner cooked and everything in order.
Now, I don't leave myself out of the equation. My idea of relaxation is a getaway to the spa or a trip somewhere with the hubby or other family members. Somedays I just like to curl up on the sofa with soft music in the background and get into a really good book.
Maybe one day, I'll get the inspiration to churn something out worth reading. Since the publications of my last novels, "Mile High Confessions, " and "Happily Never After," I feel my writing has since moved in another direction. A lot of it has to do with my changing interests. Some of it may be contributed to my level of maturity. What I thought seemed relevant once, has no significance in my life now. My level of spirituality has grown tremendously. There's more to life than the superficial characters I have often written about in my books. I guess it's okay, if you tend to like that but I feel like taking my characters and my readers in a new direction now. Stay tuned.