Trying Not to Pull My Hair Out

I was away from my daughter for four days.  On our first full day together she wakes up fussing and crying.  She didn't want to eat.  She barely lasted through her nap.  I checked her temperature twice to see if she was running a fever and it was normal.  I try holding her next to me to comfort her and she's squirming and falling into tantrums.  I take her outside to get some fresh air and that doesn't work.  Right now I'm trying not to pull my hair out.  She's in her baby bed still crying her eyes out.  I think those four days she spent with grandma may have something to do with it.  See grandma will hold her and coddle her and fix her gourmet meals.  Me, on the other hand, I'm trying to make her more independent.  I prepare her meals that are edible...but gourmet?  

Am I a bad parent for not picking her up every time she cries?  Will I be turned in if I don't cook her gourmet meals?  I'm trying my best not to pull my hair out.